“My name is Wagner. I now retire to dressing room to relieve blue balls.”

He deserves it

School Of Rock (2003)

Flabby cretin uses bad music to spoil innocence and education for middle American poindexters.

2/5

Bad Santa (2003)

Part-time burgler in fancy dress becomes addicted to anal sex and whiskey.

3/5

From Dusk Till Dawn (1996)

Unfeasible dick weapon gets overshadowed by sexy girl feet and outlandish butchery.

3/5

“Even though a fart could knock me over, never forget that I am a dangerous street-tough! The more colours I wear, the more votes I will get!”

Shs spent a whole 3 minutes getting ready

“Nooooo!!! They made me wear my Nan’s night gown again and I think there is sperm on it!”

Wearing shit clothes is so 'current'

“Gonna rock the stage with my considerable bulk! Someone re-enforce this thing with titanium steel.”

She likes a bit of food

“When I move one of my hands away from the mic like this, all the limp dick telephone voting motherfuckers out there go wild!”

Dramatic palms!

High Fidelity (2000)

Music dorks make apprentice music dorks wish they’d studied harder.

3/5

“My name is Wagner. I am here to sing Creep song originally by stroke-face student.”

He doesn't belong here