Tag Archives: Jesus Christ

CV Tip #189 (Jimmy Saville)

4 Jun

A covering letter is not a platform for you to be puting the world to rights. It’s about demonstrating your skills and experience to potential employers in order to get them to actually read your CV, rather than deleting it.

So always avoid silly, vague, pointless quips such as this:

‘I believe in Jesus Christ and therefore I try to help people in need.’

CV Tip #104 (Office LOLs)

31 May

Very few employers are looking to hire a David Brent figure, especially an evangelical one, so avoid puting statements like this on a CV:

‘I am an enjoyable character who brings a joy to the office by the grace of Jesus Christ.’

CV Tip #40 (Christianty)

21 Oct

Always tailor an application form to your audience and pay particular attention to the country’s cultural diversity at all times. Spouting Biblical nonsense at any time is strictly forbidden:

‘Soft hearted but strong in my conviction and integrity., live a good healthy habit and most of all a God fearing and live a life with principles of the gospel of Jesus Christ.’

CV Tip #103 (Religious fanatic)

18 Oct

‘IM ALSO AN ELDER AT MY CHURCH AND COMMITED TO THE WORK AND THE TEACHING OF JESUS CHRIST OUR SAVIOUR.’

Why not start getting committed to doing something more useful with your life, such as learning some skills that will make you vaguely employable?

Always bare in mind that a recruiter is looking to fill a vacancy, not be confronted with biased religious statements.

The Last Temptation Of Christ (1988 dir. Martin Scorcese)

7 Aug

Director of Christianity gets the horn during death after forming a short-lived gang in pre-Biblican times.

2/5

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