Archive | 8:38 pm

Green Lantern (2011 dir. Martin Campbell)

13 Aug

Douchebag must defy all physics laws and save planet of LG smart phones in order to bag career-driven skirt.

2/5

Bridesmaids (2011 dir. Paul Feig)

13 Aug

Shitting, flying, fucking and bakery causes lifelong bond between aged Saturday Night Live sluts to implode.

2/5

Planet Of The Apes (2001 dir. Tim Burton)

13 Aug

Unrestrained thespery, and poorly handled action sequences, sullies middle aged nerds’ cherished franchise.

1/5

Solaris (2002 dir. Steven Soderbergh)

13 Aug

Not unlike a more pleasant The Thing in space, minus puppetry.

2/5

Kick-Ass (2010 dir. Matthew Vaughn)

13 Aug

Dedicated masturbator fights organised crime archetypes with offspring of eccentric DC comic fanatic.

3/5

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