WELL DONE! Joey Essex completes toilet training 5 months ahead of schedule

9 Jul

By Slick Nick | @Poppeelings

TOWIE star Joey Essex has surprised his critics by completing the final round of toilet training a full five months ahead of schedule. He is now fully qualified to use a toilet unaided and intends to celebrate in style by seeing Ice Age 4 at the Braintree Odeon cinema this weekend.

The tanned male, 19, has overcome a lifetime of learning difficulties and can finally discard the potty that has been kept under his bed since birth.

He has cited a profound focus and determination as the keys to achieving his goal, as well as the promise of an entire pound of sherbert lemons from TOWIE show producers.

Mr Essex’s lack of full toilet training had caused undue stress to fellow TOWIE cast members during the filming of the hit show’s sixth season earlier this year, costing the production team many hours on set whilst he attended to several soiled undergarments. The stench at times was reportedly ‘unbarable’.

Perhaps now he will finally be able to move in with his mystery gay lover (pictured below) in Brighton?

Pop Peelings wishes them both well.

Gays: Joey Essex, left, brushes nipples with his current partner

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